"What is Burning Man/A Burn?"
I describe burns as 'regional community events, in which likeminded individuals come together to express their unique gifts and find spiritual growth'. However you describe it though, the community follows a set of 10 principles as part of Burning Man sanctioning.
"Burning Man co-founder Larry Harvey wrote the Ten Principles in 2004 as guidelines for the newly-formed Regional Network. They were crafted not as a dictate of how people should be and act, but as a reflection of the community’s ethos and culture as it had organically developed since the event’s inception." - Burning Man Website
As I was preparing for my first burn and I was familiarizing myself with the 10 principles, I also began explaining them to my daughter who was almost 8 at the time. In that explanation I started to give her life examples of each principle to help her with real world connections to abstract ideas. Though they aren't directions on how to live, I was happily surprised to find that for most of my adult life I have striven towards a lifestyle pillared on those very concepts. And that actually practicing them as working guides to my life and my parenting was easy and right for me.
I want to share some of my ideas for practicing burn culture in our daily lives and why I think it's important to teach this lifestyle to my children, even if they choose a different path later on.
Radical Inclusion
"Anyone may be a part of Burning Man. We welcome and respect the stranger. No prerequisites exist for participation in our community."
Right from the first principle we have to adjust to be less specific. 'Don't turn people away' is a common thread of decency in any culture though, and as such is a simple principle to follow anywhere you are. Taking that a step further we can accept everyone equally upon first meeting; with openness and a willingness to listen and learn from our time with them.
It is imperative that if we come across someones ideas that makes us uncomfortable, we confront that in a healthy manner. Accepting opposing view points and beliefs and growing from them. By allowing people into my life without judgement I have formed deep and unwavering friendships and the ability to connect spiritually with people in even a short time.
Gifting
"Burning Man is devoted to acts of gift giving. The value of a gift is unconditional. Gifting does not contemplate a return or an exchange for something of equal value."
This is one of our favorites at home. Giving freely of time, possessions, ideas, or love/support has always been part of who I am and who I teach my children to be. I enjoy receiving gifts and cherish them, but I deeply love the act of giving so much more. Whether it be physical or intangible, allowing yourself to put others first by giving without expectation of return allows unfiltered, genuine joy to flow throughout.
This is one of those principles that becomes fluid as you practice it. If gifting sounds good but you're not sure how to begin, my suggestion is that it begins with allowing yourself to give up your excess when ever you're able. Food, clothes, times, etc. Volunteer at a retirement home, or have coffee with a friend and focus on them the whole time. Offer to babysit so someone can have a night out. The gifts you can give of yourself are endless. A song, a hug, a smile for someone having a hard day. Sometimes an unprompted compliment is the gift someone's been missing.
As you begin gifting of yourself and your belongings/time more, you'll grow a greater appreciation of what you have and what you have to offer. Gifting breeds love and happiness in yourself as well as those you gift to. Yes this is definitely my favorite!
Decommodification
"In order to preserve the spirit of gifting, our community seeks to create social environments that are unmediated by commercial sponsorships, transactions, or advertising. We stand ready to protect our culture from such exploitation. We resist the substitution of consumption for participatory experience."
This one is a little more difficult to practice in the real world. To me decommodification goes deeper than exercising a commitment against capitalism, but really speaks to a mindset. When you remove money's relevance in your daily goings on, it's easier to prioritize a decommodified lifestyle.
"I don't care about money" is an easy thing to say and an easier thing to misunderstand. I work hard, but money never has been, and never will be, one of my top priorities. When you let go of the idea that you're working for money, and start enjoying the things you do, with money as a pleasant consequence of hard work, you're able to let go of job stress and be content in your career for longer.
I'm working to grow more than just money, I'm working to build relationships, to learn more about the business world. I'm working to make personal connections and lasting spiritual impact, on myself, as well as others. None of these things involve money, and because I am able to focus on those aspects I am happier.
Money allows me to do the extra things that I enjoy past the survival aspects of life. But I've been equally as Bally with and without money in my life, I have a lot to fall back on that keeps me from falling into a place of darkness when money stress becomes inevitable.
Decommodification is the hardest for me to convey and one of the deepest running veins of my life.
Radical Self-Reliance
"Burning Man encourages the individual to discover, exercise and rely on his or her inner resources."
If you only follow one principle, let it be this one. This principle goes hand in hand with personal responsibility, a concept that could radically change the world if we all embraced it. You may find obstacles in your life, you may need to ask for assistance in achieving your goals, but simply waiting for someone else to do it for you will accomplish very little in your life.
No matter the task, l try to put as much of myself in it as possible. I use all of my resources before asking someone else to give me theirs. Radical self-reliance is a concept that takes time to perfect. It begins slowly, as it does with children becoming more independent. Try to eliminate phrases from your vocabulary like "they should really take care of that" or "if only someone would..." and start replacing those thoughts with "how can I bring attention to that?" Or "I should begin a..." and see how much more control you begin to feel you have. It is a security no one else can provide you.
Radical Self-Expression
"Radical self-expression arises from the unique gifts of the individual. No one other than the individual or a collaborating group can determine its content. It is offered as a gift to others. In this spirit, the giver should respect the rights and liberties of the recipient."
Expression is such a slippery slope for so many. What some find offensive or off putting, others find beautiful or deep. Showing who you are, through your clothing, music, food, crafting, dance, etc. as well as asking open and legitimate questions when presented with a form of expression that makes us uncomfortable, helps us all grow and learn.
We learn boundaries and respect for others through self expression by gauging their reactions to our gifts. By confronting our daily social constraints with honest, approachable self expression we invite others to open themselves up as well. A cycle of growth begins when you communicate through self expression.
Communal Effort
"Our community values creative cooperation and collaboration. We strive to produce, promote and protect social networks, public spaces, works of art, and methods of communication that support such interaction."
Coming together with your community to accomplish similar goals as you or your family is a great way to support communal effort in your life. By choosing something important to you, such as a local library, a community center, or indigenous animal preservation, and involving the people physically closest to you, you begin a chain of involvement.
As my daughter gets older more volunteering opportunities are opening up for her. Some of the ways I'll introduce this principle to her in the coming years is to have her choose somewhere to volunteer her time and then invite a friend(s). For children, their school is really their closest community, and so we will begin to invite more friends and classmates and their parents to attend our volunteering as well. My hope is that she will eventually begin to organize these events on her own.
We can create social bonds that will continue to serve the community and our families. You can donate materials, time, advertising, and more to the community efforts you support. You'll learn a lot from and about your neighbors as you coordinate events or donations. Often times you meet people with whom you disagree and that can become a treasured learning experience. By involving your children they gain a sense of control in the happenings of their community as well.
Civic Responsibility
"We value civil society. Community members who organize events should assume responsibility for public welfare and endeavor to communicate civic responsibilities to participants. They must also assume responsibility for conducting events in accordance with local, state and federal laws."
Here's an example of how to apply this in your life: Let's say you were to have a party at your home, you would assume all responsibility for what happened on your property during that time, to all participants.
Now assume you're throwing a block party, now you're still responsible for your property and any guests who come and go, except it's now an open invite. You're not responsible for anyone else's events or decorations, but you assume a general responsibility of public safety.
This can be anywhere and at anytime, no one benefits from a blind eye to something preventable.
Leaving No Trace
"Our community respects the environment. We are committed to leaving no physical trace of our activities wherever we gather. We clean up after ourselves and endeavor, whenever possible, to leave such places in a better state than when we found them."
I believe littering has been outlawed for my entire adult life, which is one of those double edge swords. We don't see trash as an insult to our planet, or disrespectful to our community, until it's overwhelming. We don't realize that sometimes what we take away can be as devastating as what we leave behind.
It's a common misconception that leaving the straw wrapper you see laying on the ground isn't as bad as putting it there, but seeing a problem and doing nothing to assist in a solution, makes you partly culpable. Start picking up trash you see as you take a walk, or run a recycling program in your neighborhood.
My little girl loves to pick up trash and until recently I'd discouraged her because it was unknown and dirty. But I realized that inadvertently I was teaching her that she is more important than the planet and its inhabitants, and that's ridiculous. So I made some carry along bags to aide in safe and clean pick up. I also discourage her from picking flowers for me too often, and instead urge her to point them out instead, or bring me gifts of fallen flowers we can preserve.
I want her to embrace a natural love of the planet and allow that respect and behavior to blossom.
Participation
"Our community is committed to a radically participatory ethic. We believe that transformative change, whether in the individual or in society, can occur only through the medium of deeply personal participation. We achieve being through doing. Everyone is invited to work. Everyone is invited to play. We make the world real through actions that open the heart."
Start doing things. Anywhere and everywhere. Volunteer at an animal shelter even if you're not a pet lover. Go see a local band you've never heard of (I saw Seether in a hole in the wall night club in Johnson City, TN years ago). Start a revolving potluck dinner with friends. Get a (possibly additional lol) part time job and work somewhere you have no experience in.
Just throw yourself into life. It's going to end one day and what better way to honor yourself than by absorbing every moment life has offered you.
And here is an anecdote that is burn specific about how volunteering can change you're whole experience:
I read a post on Facebook by a fellow burner who has volunteered for perimeter for many years. Perimeter is a safety detail in which you remain vigilant, with your back to the burning effigy (the main event for many people) and watch the crowd. Right off many people would dismiss this as being undesirable. You can't watch the fire, the heat is often intense, and for obvious reasons, you must remain sober. But reading this wonderful spirit's perspective on perimeter, I was brought, several times, to tears and immediately moved to volunteer for next year. I was one of MANY who felt that strongly. There will likely be too many of us haha. His POV of watching the reactions of those around him enjoying the effigy urn, it was beautiful. It reminded me that the "main event" isn't always the most interesting part of the situation.
So the moral of this story is that changing your point of view and throwing yourself into sometimes less than ideal situations can lead to amazing experiences.
Immediacy
"Immediate experience is, in many ways, the most important touchstone of value in our culture. We seek to overcome barriers that stand between us and a recognition of our inner selves, the reality of those around us, participation in society, and contact with a natural world exceeding human powers. No idea can substitute for this experience."
This is probably one of the easiest and most difficult, depending on your mindset. Immediacy is partially about being in the moment, not allowing the negativity of everyday life pull you out of deep and meaningful expressions and interactions.
Immediacy is also about stoping to ask "why?". Two sides of one coin. When you're doing, saying, or perpetuating something, take a moment to ask yourself why you're doing it (personally). From there you can begin to explore where it came from, and other questions of growth. By stoping in the moment to ask yourself these insights about your own beliefs and behaviors, you begin to see the world through a new lens.
The minutia of the world will fall away more easily and getting in touch with the true magic of this world, however you identify it, will become as easy as breathing. When you are able to ask yourself honest questions and analyze those responses through growth, you find peace of mind and soul.
My daughter is not good at expressing her emotions verbally, and often she acts out when she doesn't get her way and knows that a fight will not end in her favor. Immediacy helps give her tools to explore how she feels and express it in a healthy manner. Asking her "why" and teaching her to ask herself that has given her a sense of authority over herself.
It's helped me as a parent as well. Immediacy allows me to slow down and stop thinking about bills, groceries, gas, camp, etc. and lets me enjoy her cartwheels in the house. I'm focused on the right things at the right times more often and it leaves me less stressed and less anxious.
This is a work in progress, it's my life and I'm still learning how to live it. Everyday I learn a great deal and I work hard to apply these new ideas to how I view and follow the 10 principles. I try to teach my children primarily through example and discussion.
I used to yell a lot, I used to have a sleeping anger inside of me all the time. I was anxious and tired and depressed. I slowly began finding ways to help alleviate the negativity; solutions to a healthier life. Then I discovered burns. Specifically my Virgin Burn, To The Moon in Sneedville, TN.
In many ways, everything about TTM was a convergence of magic in my life. It left me calmer, more resolved, and ultimately happier. My time on The Moon deserves its own post though and so I will close this one out with a thank you for reading.
It has taken me more than a week to write this, and it has renewed in me a dedication and patience for my writing. Thank you for taking your time to read it. Thank you for listening to my views and opinions. I am eager to hear your responses and learn what I can from how you have applied the principles to your life.
Happy Soul Searching
-Sleepy Fox
Bonus: so as I'm getting ready to transfer this file and edit it for posting Button starts to talk to me about how she's bored and can she (and I'm only half listening to be honest) something about dog poop and trash and volunteering door to door and I finally had to look up and refocus. My poor kid was so excited and I had no idea what she was talking about. But it sounded like I should. So I set this aside and I turned my attention fully to her. 30 minutes later this STILL isn't ready but she is happily sitting next to me on the couch and making volunteer fliers to put up in the neighborhood. She wants to spend some time each week collecting trash, or helping pick up poop, or 17 other ideas she said so fast I couldn't keep up lol.
I haven't read my portion on communal effort to her yet, I didn't tell her about my ideas for her summer or future. But I sat back and let her mirror back the things I try to show her daily and she surpassed me 10 fold. I'm so proud of her and humbled by her boundless heart.
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